Let's Play Ball

Altenir Silva

Story Line: Once upon time a debate…   SCENE ONE   October 03, 2012. Dressing room at University of Denver. Mr. Romney sits alone on stage. Mr. Obama enters.   OBAMA Hi!   ROMNEY (Turns to Obama) You?   OBAMA Mr. Romney... I need to talk to you.   ROMNEY I think it's a terrible course for America to stand in apology for our values.   OBAMA What're you talking about?             ROMNEY My speech! My speech, Mr. Obama. By the way, should we be talking before the debate?   OBAMA I think so. It's America! Everyone speaks with everybody.   ROMNEY I know, but you caught me off guard.   OBAMA Um… Well… I'm here because… because… my wife asked me to invite you to see a game at the ballpark. We could have a beer, too, huh?   ROMNEY Why?   OBAMA I'm a Democrat... You're Republican... and...   ROMNEY It's America!   OBAMA Exactly.   ROMNEY What game?    OBAMA Who cares?   ROMNEY I'm Mormon! I don't drink beer.   OBAMA Okay. You can eat Cracker Jacks.   ROMNEY I prefer hot dogs.   OBAMA Whatever.   ROMNEY I don't care about baseball. But I understand politics. I know that our economy suffered several strikeouts.   (Silence.)   OBAMA Unfortunately. It's very complicated. I'm doing my best.   ROMNEY I know, I know.   OBAMA But what about the game?   ROMNEY That's okay. I accept your invitation, but only if you agree to go somewhere with me.   OBAMA Of course.   ROMNEY Really?   OBAMA Yeah! When?   ROMNEY Next Saturday.   OBAMA Okay. Where are we going?   ROMNEY A tea party.   OBAMA (Shouts out.) Michelle!   (Lights up on another corner of the stage. Waiting room. Michelle Obama and Ann Romney are sitting on the sofa.)   MICHELLE Did you hear that?   ANN I think it's your husband!   MICHELLE Hope they aren't fighting.   ANN Poor boys!   MICHELLE Forget about them. Let's enjoy our conversation.   ANN Right. You were talking about when you first met him.   OBAMA (Shouts out.) Michelle!   MICHELLE I gotta go.   (Michelle gets up and approaches Obama.)   MICHELLE What's the matter with you?   OBAMA (To Michelle) Mr. Romney! Can you believe what he said? He invited me to a tea party!   (Ann approaches of them.)   MICHELLE So?   OBAMA Governor Romney seems to have a tendency to shoot first and aim later.   ANN What? No way. Trust my husband, he doesn't fail, he will not fail.   ROMNEY (To Ann.) Thanks, honey.   MICHELLE (To Obama.) Just do it.   OBAMA (To Michelle.) Are you sure?   MICHELLE Of course.   ROMNEY (Singing,) "Take me out to the ball game, Take me out with the crowd".   OBAMA (To Michelle) But it's a tea party, huh?   MICHELLE Did he accept your invite to the ballpark?   OBAMA Yeah.   MICHELLE Then, everything is fine.   OBAMA You're right. By the way, we are Americans.   MICHELLE Nobody's perfect!   BLACKOUT.   (We hear the music "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" song by Jack Norworth and Albert Von Tilzer.)   END