There
will come a time
perhaps in your life
in which you come to
the jarring
realization that you
have spent a
lifetime fighting
other people's
battles, if not all
out wars. And
let's face it, they
were all
petty. You
have been subjected
to other people's
agendas, punched
their timeclocks,
ran their errands,
lived their dreams
vicariously as yours
withered and died on
the vine. You
may have served God,
you may have served
the devil, or you
may have served Mr.
Spacely from the old
Jetson's cartoon
show. As Mr.
Robert Zimmerman
once proclaimed,
"You Gotta Serve
Somebody". You
survived but lost
yourself in the
process.
You have done your
best to keep up with
the Jones's, you've
competed with the
Cooper's. You
schemed against the
Schmidt's. And all
the while you
claimed you were
trying to escape to
a simpler place like
Luckenbach, Texas
"back to the basics
of love". You
made a few bucks,
but not enough to
live in the fast
lane. You
always looked for
the exit ramp that
led to the Freedom
Highway but ended up
going round and
round your circle
driveway waving
goodbye. Find
yourself as the dad
in the Harry Chapin
song, The Cat's
In The Cradle. And
as the song says,
your kids will grow
up just like you-
striving, reaching
for the mirage of
upward mobility, but
neglecting those
closest to
them. We are
like ships passing
in the night.
Sleep if it comes is
uneasy, it's the
tossing, the
turning, the
constant worrying,
the grinding and
gnashing of teeth
that torments
us.
Shoulda.
Coulda,
Woulda.
Regrets? You
ponder them while
playing your cello
on the deck of the
Titanic.
Because there will come a day as the aging singer in Amanda decries, "I looked in the mirror in total surprise, at the hair on my shoulder and the age in my eyes". Wisdom does come with age, but as a wise philosopher once pointed out – youth is wasted on the young. You're old now, driving up to a handicapped parking spot at a desolate mall you remember from your youth. You see a young man appearing out of nowhere – full of vim, vigor, vitality, creative energy with the whole world in front of him. You check the obituaries to make sure you're not listed there.
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